Friday, March 10, 2017

Repurposed Em - Lent, Suffering and Sickness...

RepurposedEm #7

Happy Friday All!

Today is the 2nd Friday in Lent. My child has been sick with the flu/upper respiratory for almost two weeks (it will be two weeks on Sunday). We have suffered together - him with his aches and pains, me with my lack of ability to eat what I want... and we offer it all up to the Lord.

You see, in Lent - we are called to suffer joyfully and we have really been trying. And yes... failing here and there. But God lead us here and we will get through it all.

Before I go on, beware of the flu this year, it's treacherous. And I thank God that we have not gotten it. The boy was on Tamiflu, Steroids and antibiotics.  The good news was, he was eating bland foods as well so it worked out for both of us. HA!



For those of you who are new here, I was writing a weekly post about WL Surgery. Now, I'm at a point where it's not that exciting... not much to report, so I believe I'll go to Monthly.  It is hard to believe that I am in my 5th week after Surgery. So much has changed since I've come home from the hospital.  I put this surgery off for YEARS! God had a hand in it, and it's GREAT!

I am finally in the stages of eating where I can actually eat real food (not pureed) - though I admit, I am sticking to the bland. For me, this just seems to work better.

I can not wait to start cooking all the recipes I have found on My Bariatric Kitchen. I also have a great cookbook that I plan to use. I can't wait to start cooking things I can eat to, for my family.

Let's talk about Questions People Ask...
  • Do you cook for your family?  Yes. I am the housewife and chief chef at Chez Davis!  My son and husband are capable of cooking, but I am back up to doing about 80% of the cooking, and I so enjoy it.  
  • Is it true that you don't like the same things?  Not so much for me. But I will be honest, I tried a ricotta bake because it sounded good, but it made me sick to my stomach, and I determined it was too rich. 
  • What is the hardest thing? EATING SLOWLY! Without doubt, this is the hardest for me.  I have had a few "episodes" because I was not paying attention and ate too quickly. THIS is no fun. I'll spare you the details.
  • Do you have Fears? I am not great about working out. And I need to ramp that up. But my biggest fear is hair loss. Many people who have bariatric surgery lose hair, some lose large amounts. I am having problems stomaching the vitamins and I just really don't want to lose my hair.  It's vain, I know. But it's a fear.  I fear not being able to tone my skin and needing surgery down the road. I know that God is with me and in charge and I promise I'm not sitting around freaking out... but it's a fear. I don't have any serious long-term fears because I know that God will lead me. About the hair, I know God will help with that too. It's irrational, I know.
I plan to lose only 2 lbs or so/week. I feel that is the healthiest way to go. I feel it also gives me a chance to tone things. And this makes me feel good.  I have seen pictures of skin-removal surgeries.... OUCHIE! I mean - I do anticipate perhaps a tummy tuck and a breast lift. But I'd like to keep it at that. I mean - I'm 53... and I don't think a lot of surgery is great at any age... you know?

Did I tell you we are turning our dining/front living room into a gym. I will post pics once it's done. We are also hoping to sell,  but I can't live here like I don't live here... you know? I hope people will still buy!


Back to what you need to know...

Let's talk about the psychology of it all... 

My advice, if you have a food addiction, deal with that before you have surgery, otherwise you will sabotage yourself. Talk to a counselor about how to control yourself. Don't get surgery and work to figure out how you can cheat on the new way of life you are supposed to be living. It's so counter productive. And it's hard to watch! Sigh. If you need help or accountability, seek it out.

I have learned in various Bariatric Groups that it is unhealthy for me to be in some groups. Why? Because I've noticed that some people go through all that surgery entails, and still push the limits of what they should eat.  I think I just don't understand where everyone else is coming from. For instance, I was never a food addict. My weight gain and inability to lose was due to problems with my health. I had been changing the way we eat for years. My mouth was hanging wide open the first time someone asked what they could have at a fast food restaurant.  Or if they can have a soda... Think about it... why would you eat fast food if you are trying to lose weight? Now listen before you get angry - I get that sometimes in our travels, we may have to choose a healthy option at a Chick-Fil-A, Panera, a diner or some other kind of restaurant. I totally get that. It's good to know how to read menus, etc. But it's strange that right after surgery this would be your question. Mine were, "how can I keep these vitamins down?" or things related to recovery.

Part of the process of my surgery was making sure I could psychologically handle all that was coming. Making sure I understood what I couldn't have and the kinds of changes I had to make. I will admit, I did not understand it as well then as I do now - walking through it.  But - I am also a rule follower.

The reality is that it is a little depressing that you can't eat what you want; that you can't eat what your family is eating. It's a bummer when you react to a food and gag.  But it is temporary.  And you will find your groove - or so I am told! I am holding on tight to that. AND there are so many good things to eat.

Let's talk about change in taste buds...

And Smells... and many other things, HA!

Yes - it's true. The yogurt I have always loved now tastes too sweet.  Sigh. I find that, for now, I have to stick with a more bland sort of diet because it's just easier for me. I eat a lot of cottage cheese, oatmeal, low-sodium soups, pork, chicken, refried beans, bananas, pears, shredded cheese, fish - you get the point. I'm going to start branching out though. I need to. Gotta get in the good nutrients.

Plus things smell strange. Or I gag when I try to eat them. If it is too fatty or spicy smelling - GAG. My poor husband! And ya'll, if your new tummy does not like what you put in her/him... you will know. HA

Let's talk about changes in body and how you see yourself...  I have not weighed this little in four or five years.  But I can't yet see what others see. Yes, my face is thinner and I am thinner... but I don't want to get in my head and be happy with where I am. I'm concerned it will make me complacent. And that is no bueno!

Let's talk about dressing appropriately... 

Losing weight is freeing,  and it feels good... but I intend to be the same modest person I am now, once I get to my goal. I tell you - it's everyone's right to dress as they will. But if I may --- Please reserve your private parts for your husband. I can not tell you how many pictures I've seen of weight loss results and the cleavage is downright scandalous. Girls - we don't need to see your breasts. We can tell you lost weight. And that is private.

My husband and I have talked out our guidelines for me and what will be my new body. But if you don't have a husband or significant other, I'd like to encourage you to have respect for yourself and stay modest in your dressing.  When we are heavy, we like to cover ourselves. It becomes about wearing clothing that fits or covers the rolls, etc. When you lose weight, the temptation is to show too much skin. I totally get it.

I guess what I am trying to say is celebrate being smaller and wearing smaller sizes! Don't celebrate by showing things no one else but your significant other needs to see.

Let's talk about getting a Nutrition Coach and Cultivate a Support Group.... Ya'll this is essential. The group at My Bariatric Kitchen and in the classes I took, are essential to me. The coach is my go-to. She would push me back towards my docs if she didn't feel comfy answering, BUT she
is cultivating and atmosphere of support and it's essential to my success. I believe that.  There are so many people who have surgery and don't have a surgeon who gives them nutritional guidelines and help. There are people who don't have supportive families or good self-esteem. We all need people who build us up; are honest with us; and care about our success. God made us this way.

This new walk I am on is NOT easy.  If not for God leading me in the right directions, I would never be successful. In five pounds, I will be under 200. I can not wait. I know - 200 and someone 5'1" is still big. I get it. But I've almost lost 50 lbs, so I'm going to concentrate on that.

Here I am this morning...


As you can see, I have a lot of work to do still. But I am happy with me! And that is something you can not put a price on. Sure, people thought I was happy before, but if I am being honest, I missed friends weddings, my class reunions and many other things because I was so embarrassed. It sounds silly - but I keep things real.

Can I just say that being Catholic works out with this surgery really well?! It does. I can't eat much meat in general, and certainly find it easier to give it up on Fridays. I just thought I'd share that. <3

OK - I am totally babbling. I hope my posts help you in some way. If you have questions - please ask.

Love, Hugs and Blessings,


4 comments:

  1. Emily,
    I'm sorry your son has been so sick :( No fun! I'm holding my breath and praying our family doesn't get sick. I'm glad you are doing so well 5 weeks after surgery. I find your posts interesting and informative about your experience. Thanks for sharing!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much. I'm sorry I didn't respond sooner.
      Hugs!

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  2. Em, you look fabulous girl!! ABsolutely wonderful...you look healthy, fit, stylish, happy---oh my goodness....wonderful. So happy for you that your recovery is going smoothly....I'm impressed by your plans as you move ahead and the steps you're taking....such as how mch pre week you plan to continue losing.

    I'm so enjoying reading up on all the behind the scenes of the surgery. I'm really proud of you too, Em!

    I hope your little man feels better soon! Poor kid.

    Love to visit! I'll stop back soon!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you sweet friend.
      Hugs & Blessings,
      Em

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Em